The Best Part of Breaking Up

I have mentioned a delicate relationship situation here and there, and how the latest development was to just sit back and let it run its natural course. Well, its natural course seemed to involve everything getting derailed and ending, so once again, I am officially single¹. While I wasn’t sure how receptive I would be to my newly single status, I’ve come to terms with it and have welcomed the best parts of breaking up with open arms.

Every break up is hard, and each one is different. No two break ups are the same, even if you are breaking up with the a person you have broken up with before. But even though it sucks and you feel like you’ve hit rock bottom and that the world is that much bigger, and you are that much more alone once the split has happened, not all is lost. Independence often seems to be undervalued by people that are part of codependent relationships, but I think independence is a fantastic thing. Being independent is crucial to my personal happiness; the moment I get too dependent and too reliant on someone else is when I know that things need to change dramatically or I will only end up getting myself hurt in the end.

I think the best part of breaking up is the feeling of being free. Free to do whatever I like with whomever I like whenever I like, and not having to answer to anyone, or explain myself to anyone, or having to choose between the boy and my friends. When you find the right person, all of this is easy to give up, but once you’re broken up, the freedom associated with singledom is officially yours to claim again. It’s hard at first, yes, but you get there in the end, and when you do, the feeling is fantastic. It’s also nice to be done with the teary fights, the late night arguments, the miscommunication, the confusion, and the nagging feelings of doubt and uncertainty that is generally part of the end of a relationship. I want the tears I cry to be tears for me, and not be tears over what someone else has said or done to make me upset.

Question of the Week: What are some of the best parts of breaking up?

1. Well, not officially according to Facebook, since I have gotten married to one of my good male friends and am not listed as single, but that is neither here nor there. [↩]

Cross-posted from breakthesky.net. Please leave any comments there.