disalarming

While eating at a restaurant in Guangzhou two weeks ago, my friend and I attempted to flag down the waiter to get the bill for our meal. In mainland China, it is customary to shout “服务员!” (fú​wù​yuán / waiter/waitress) to get a server’s attention. Sometimes, depending on how busy they are or how much attention they are paying to you, you have to shout “服务员” several times before they notice you need attending to.

In Guangzhou, two languages are spoken: Mandarin Chinese (standard) and Cantonese (dialect). English is limited. Because my friend and I both look white, we were usually addressed with either simple Mandarin (你好 [nǐ​hǎo​ / hello], etc) or limited English. No one ever suspected we speak pretty decent Mandarin, thanks to our studies in Beijing, or that I have a working fluency in Cantonese.

After shouting “服务员” several times, we finally got a waiter’s attention. But not before I overheard the manager grumble in Cantonese, “服务员, 服务员. That’s the only Chinese those white people know.”

Clearly, the manager had no idea I knew Cantonese. Or that both of us knew Mandarin.

(Regular text is for English, bold is for Mandarin, italics is for Cantonese.)

Me (to friend): Manager lady just said the only Chinese we know is 服务员.
Friend (to manager): Excuse me? You think the only Chinese we know is 服务员?
Me (to manager): You don’t really think we’d be traveling in China if we didn’t know Chinese, do you?
Manager (to coworker): Did they hear what I said?
Coworker (to manager): Well, they’re speaking in both Mandarin and Cantonese. I’m pretty sure they heard and understood you.
Friend (to manager): Damn straight we heard what you said.
Me (to manager): Just because we’re not Chinese doesn’t mean we can’t speak the language, you know.

I think the manager will think twice before talking about her customers to their faces again, regardless of what language she chooses!

Cross-posted from breakthesky.net. Please leave any comments there.

Chinese is a tonal language; a simple change in inflection can change the entire meaning of a word. Tones are hard for any non-native Chinese speaker to learn, for obvious reasons. It’s particularly embarrassing when you intend to say something completely harmless and innocent but instead say something suggestive or inappropriate!

Once, my friend and I essentially told each other we should start making out in the middle of class. What we meant to say was “ask,” but we butchered the tone for “ask” so instead of wèn (问) we said wěn (吻). So instead of saying “We should ask,” we said, “we should kiss.”

No wonder our 老师 (lǎoshī / teacher) stared at us in shock when she overheard us. It’s probably not the first time I’ve said something inappropriate due to mangling the tones, either. I swear, these tones will be the death of me!

Cross-posted from breakthesky.net. Please leave any comments there.

Those who know me know that I love languages; I speak fluent English and Cantonese and am studying French and Mandarin Chinese at university. I’d also love to learn Italian and Swahili in the future, but I want to improve my conversational French and become conversational in Mandarin Chinese before tackling new languages! Russian is also a language I’d like to learn, but the likelihood of that ever happening is practically non-existent.

I’ve always been really jealous of students in Asia and Europe who start studying other languages at a really young age in school¹. My cousins in Hong Kong study Cantonese, Mandarin Chinese, and English, and my cousins in Shanghai study Shanghainese, Mandarin Chinese, and English. The kids in the French family I stayed with while on my French exchange trip studied French, German, and English, and the German exchange student my family hosted last month studied German, Spanish, and English. In other words, basically everyone I’ve met while on my travels study at least two languages at school, even the young students I met at some of the schools I worked at/visited while in Tanzania, but most of my friends have no real interest in any language, not even English²!

Maybe the reason why I’m so fascinated with languages and jealous of those who are multilingual is not only because of my own bilingual household, but because languages were never really forced upon me in school, unlike the vast majority of schools I’ve encountered overseas. I hate traveling to countries and being perceived as the ignorant American tourist who thinks English is the only language worth knowing; I want to know more about the world around me, both in terms of politics and culture. While I personally received a very good education up to and including my university schooling, there’s still so much I wish I was taught. Multiple languages are definitely one of them.

Question of the Week: How many languages are you fluent in, and what languages are they?

1. I don’t know anything about South American or African schooling, but I think it’s safe to assume students in those continents also study multiple languages at school rather than just the official language/mother tongue. [↩]
2. These friends I am speaking of are both from Australia and the United States, countries that are not known for multilingualism in their education systems. The exception to this are my friends who have multi-racial/ethnic families. [↩]

Cross-posted from breakthesky.net. Please leave any comments there.

Most of the time, if I’m not happy with my talents and abilities, I’m at least content. I can do a lot of things fairly well, and I consider myself lucky that one of my strongest talents is writing, especially since I enjoy it so much. But there are still a lot of things I wish I could do even half-decently, let alone fantastically. The list ranges from serious things to useless quirks I wish I had, and while I don’t think I’ll be getting any of these skills anytime soon, it’s still fun to dream, right?

• Code in valid (X)HTML/CSS
  I’ve always wanted to be able to code in valid (X)HTML/CSS, but my coding skills are pretty atrocious. I can code a layout okay, but my coding skills have a lot more to be desired. I think I have the basics of XHTML down – always close your tags, nest your tags, make sure all of your coding is in lowercase, that kind of thing. But CSS is what confuses me, valid or not. It’s something I need to experiment with more, and do some trial and error stuff, before I get the hang of it, cause my CSS skills are very elementary.
• Whistle
  I have never, ever been able to whistle! Every time I try, I’m just pushing air with my lips and any noise that I manage to make is not in the least bit like a whistle. It’s very frustrating as my brother has been able to whistle for as long as I can remember, and I’ve always wished that I could whistle just like him.
• Be fluent in Russian
  I have never been to Russia, and as much as I would love to go there, I probably won’t ever get a chance to go there – at least, not anytime soon. But I’ve always wanted to learn Russian, even though it’s extremely difficult and I personally would probably never get a chance to practice any Russian I would learn. Still, it sounds like such a beautiful and cryptic language and I would love to have the skills to decipher and understand it!
• Do a cartwheel
  While I was off taking dance lessons as a little girl, some of my friends took gymnastics. A lot of the people I know can do cartwheels, backflips, and other “simple” gymnastics steps, but I can’t do any of them! I used to be extremely flexible because I was trained as a dancer, but I had to give up dancing due to a knee injury. Still, I’d love to be able to do a cartwheel. Or even a backflip…
• Be ambidextrous
  I’m right-handed, and I’ve always thought it would be cool to be able to write with my left-hand as well. It would be extremely useful when it comes to being seated at a left-handed desk at school. I was sitting in a left-handed desk yesterday when I was taking a test, and it was very distracting having to angle my whole body towards my left side so that I could write out my test!

Cross-posted from breakthesky.net. Please leave any comments there.