Bedridden

When I was 15, I busted my knee at a ballet gala. The injury effectively ended my dancing career – all 11 years worth of hard work and hopes and dreams – and has been a pesky thorn in my side ever since.

For the first year or two after the injury, I’d get odd flares of pain in my knee area. Sometimes my knee would lock and I couldn’t unlock it because of the pain. Other times I couldn’t bend it because it felt like the tendons behind my kneecap would snap clean in half if I did. No matter what happened, I’d end up having to massage my knee with my fingertips in the hopes of easing whatever was tensing in the area so that I could use my knee properly and go about my daily life without hobbling around.

Just yesterday morning, I was thinking to myself that I hadn’t had any problems with my knee for roughly the last two years. That was nothing more than a passing thought until after dinner last night, when I hopped off my dinner chair and almost keeled over from the pain in my knee. I guess I had been sitting oddly in my chair or something, because my knee just wasn’t having it. I made it over to my couch and felt like all the muscles around my knee had become incredibly tense and stiff, which was unusual because I hadn’t done anything out of the ordinary. Still, I managed somehow loosen the feeling of tightness in my knee so that I could get around the house for the remainder of my day.

When I woke up this morning and tried to move my knee, I ended up screaming in pain. The last time I screamed in pain over my knee was when I injured the damn thing! I couldn’t sit up because that hurt my knee. I couldn’t bend my legs because that hurt my knee. I couldn’t reach down to touch my knee in an attempt to massage it because that hurt my knee. Basically, I couldn’t do anything because it would hurt my freakin’ knee. I ended up laying in bed for an hour, staring at my ceiling, contemplating what on earth I could do since I basically couldn’t move at all without screaming in pain.

Somehow I managed to maneuver my body around so that I could do what I could for my knee, as I was not going to put up with being immobile all day. Now, my knee is unlocked, but there’s something still not quite right with it because it still feels very tender and sore. Guess I’m bedridden for the rest of the day until I can figure out what, exactly, is causing all of this…

Cross-posted from breakthesky.net. Please leave any comments there.