I Don’t Need a Man (But One Would Be Nice)

[disalarming]

I don’t have any qualms with being single; I never have. I especially have not had any problems with my single relationship status with my quest to detoxify my life, as there are certain ex-boyfriends that are included in that detoxifying equation.

But sometimes there are days when I wish I had someone. Someone to hold me, someone to make time to spend with me, someone to make me feel special. These days are rare, but they exist. They are the days when I feel a pang in my chest and, for a few seconds, forget about all the things I strive for every day: independence, strength, maturity. In those seconds, I am transformed from all the qualities that make me who I am and dissolve into a needy, clingy girl. It’s only for a few seconds, but those seconds are more than enough for me to to feel discomfited.

I know that I won’t get any sort of validation from being in a relationship. That’s not what a relationship is about, and seeking self-worth from someone else is never going to get one anywhere. But there are days when I think that even though I know I don’t need a man – and I hope to never need one – sometimes, having one would be nice.

Cross-posted from breakthesky.net. Please leave any comments there.